Softmindreminders

Category: Well-being

  • Why it really is about the journey

    My whole life and probably your whole life too, you heard the saying ‘It’s about the journey’. I always despised this saying, because why is it about the journey, if the destination is so much prettier?

    I thought happiness is in the destination and the journey is there because we ‘have’ to go endure it. Pain is gain, that sorts of quotes and sayings.

    Nowadays I don’t see it like this anymore. Happiness is not something that you gain, it comes from within. You either are happy right now in this moment, or you aren’t. It is not about fighting a battle, winning it and than becoming happy.

    People often think that having money will mean happiness and it can! If you were already a happy or grateful person, than money won’t have to change that. If you feel absolutely miserable and think I feel better when I have XYZ, than I have to break it to you but having XYZ will not give you any more fulfillment. It will in short term give you those fulfilled feelings, but shortly after that you will try and search for another goal to achieve. You will think okay, but I will feel even more happy if I achieve being a millionaire, or a multi-millionaire.

    It is about the journey, the journey gives you information, you learn from it. You learn from yourself and you see what it is that brings you happiness. It isn’t about achieving the goal, because than you’ll have to find a new goal, it is about the path you lay out and the people you get to know along the way.

    You can know and feel what brings you happiness, just listen to how you are feeling in this moment and listen to that. What can you do in this moment to feel a little better? Often it is very simple like grabbing a coffee, that could make you feel a little better today. Reaching out to a friend, walking your dog in nature, listening to a podcast, or just meditating and paying attention to how you are breathing.

    The journey is the most amazing thing to be on. It is your story to tell and it is yours to feel. Achieving the goal is simple, it is appreciating the journey that feels hard. But when the goal is near, the journey is what counts.

    I hope you have an amazing day today,

    x

    Softmindreminders

  • Overcoming Negative Emotions for Better Well-Being

    What is it about feeling good, that feels so easy but yet is so difficult to maintain?
    We all like to feel good, we all love to laugh (I hope), we all thrive with good friendships and lots of love that we either give or receive. We all love these things, but still whenever we feel good, why is it that we think about reasons to not feel too good, so we don’t get disappointed or heartbroken later?

    Why is it that since we are getting older, we are getting more ‘realistic’, who says that being ‘realistic’ is a great way of living, or is the way of living? I think being ‘realistic’ holds you back. I think getting yourself in a box, or listening too much to how others perceive you, is holding yourself back.

    We should feel good, all or most of the time! We should be grateful and happy were we are, even if it is not the most perfect place were you want to be.

    Emotions like frustration, anger, impatient, overwhelmed are emotions that are trying to tell you something. They are trying to say things like, this is not a place where you can be at ease, or if you feel frustrated it most definitely means that you are just trying too hard. You are trying to control things that can’t be controlled, or you are way too deep in it and do no longer see the easy way out. You feel almost helpless.

    You can feel so frustrated or irritated when you lose a key, or a glove, anything really and you keep searching with feelings of frustration and most of the time you do not find that key in that emotion. How often does it happen that you are so frustrated when you can’t find it, and the next day you find it in the most logical place. You left it there, but yet because you were feeling so negative you could not think straight.

    Why are we feeling those emotions? Every emotion has its own relevance, I get that. There are positive aspects about every feeling, even though it is sometimes hard to see. I feel like anger tells you things you don’t like and than it is up to you to listen to that emotion and see the thing you don’t like and try to give that thing less attention.

    If you are angry about a situation or a friend, try to think less of it. Don’t try to fix it immediately or dwell in the feeling of helplessness.